Oh my! Where do I even begin to express my feelings at this very moment?! I am struggling, really bad! Pregnant women, moms, anyone- care to explain how all of this works???? I feel the need to shop every moment for my baby! I wake up and immediately want to run into the (not quite put together nor completed) nursery. Then, open up the closest doors and look at the few things we have for him/her! I plop on the guest bed that is currently in the room and just sit there. I love thinking and talking about what things will be life with a baby in our lives. Sometimes I just go online and "browse" Etsy or any other amazingly, fabulous baby shop I can find! Seriously, I wander if I'm alone in this!
I was talking to my friend Holly, who fortunately for me, has become my adopting buddy! She too, is adopting a baby through Bethany. We seem to have so many things in common and she is one of the few who really understands my thoughts, fears and emotions! We were talking the other night about this very same topic... buying stuff for our babies! For most women, you have many things to look forward to throughout your pregnancy. Such as; positive pregnancy tests, ultra sounds, baby showers, finding out the sex of your baby, more showers, shopping for the baby you KNOW you're having, planning for the arrival, etc! Well, in most cases, we have a lot in common. However, the things we don't know are killing me! Now... don't get me wrong, I wouldn't trade where I am right now for anything! I am so blessed to be down this journey and starting our family through adoption. However, I also have my share of struggles as this is all so new to us!
1) Date of our babies arrival?
2) The sex of our baby?
Well, these are the parts that are quickly eating at me. I want to plan, I want to be able to take off work when the baby comes and spend time with him/her. I want to buy sweet little outfits for them and not feel like I'm buying for both genders, or all gender neutral! :( For a while, these things didn't bother me. But, as time goes on, they are. I know there are many other things we have to look forward to and plan for. In fact, we're thinking about more important things like childcare when we're working, parenting our precious baby, and learning all sorts of things we'll need to know! But again, I'm still struggling with how do you do deal with the unknowns? Any advice would be greatly appreciated!!! :)
Until then, Brantley