Saturday, February 5, 2011

Pray for Katherine Grace

Where oh where does this momma even begin.  Yesterday (Friday), started out as normal as any Friday would.  Only I had asked my mom for a little help due to the yucky weather... and I needed to run some errands (you know... diapers, etc!).  Anyway... she stayed with Katherine Grace while I went out and picked up a few things.  When I came back, my mom had said she was fussy and wasn't eating very well.  After she left, I tried putting Katherine Grace down for a little nap.  She wouldn't sleep to save her life!  Finally, after laying her on the couch with me... she fell alseep.  I then carried her into her nursery and laid her gently in her crib.  Only to then run back in there about 15 minutes later to a baby scalding hot, and beat red!  I instantly grabbed my warm baby and grabbed the thermometer.  The number I was seeing was soaring until it abruptly stopped at 101!!!!  I haven't felt so panicked as I did at that moment!  I knew something wasn't right!  I immediately called the pediatrician and they asked me to hurry and bring her in.

They ran all sorts of tests, checked for rsv and several other things.  Everything was coming back negative, however her white counts were very high.  Our doctor admitted her to the hospital and here we lay on a cot in her hospital room.  We've been here since yesterday afternoon.  The things this poor baby has been through in the last 24 hours is absolutely heartbreaking.  I wouldn't wish these things on anyone's baby - EVER!  She's so helpless and for the first time - I felt so helpless since having her in our lives.  Our journey to bring us home brought us to our knees and He was in control.  He had to make us really realize that in order for us to let go.  Since bringing her home... this was my reminder as God tugged at my heart strings and said, "its going to be okay, just let go and surrender!".  I felt scared, helpless, terrified thinking such horrible things.  In my head I kept fearing we were going to lose her (probably not smart), but that is where my head went.  I took a shower in the hospital room shower, and cried these little eyes our for a good 10 or 15 minutes.  I kept asking, "Lord please don't take her away from us!"  "We love her so much and do not want to say goodbye!" 

First of all... I'm crazy emotional and in NO WAY to they think anything bad is going to happen to her.  Everything is looking good and her levels are beginning to level back out.  But that is just where this momma's head went.  :(  It quickly reminded me of the cross and all that Jesus went through.  Although this is a pale comparison... its the closest thing I have to see.  I can't imagine letting your child go.  Again... me... crazy momma.... please ignore me!  I'm beyond emotional thinking the worse.

Anyway, God has been so gracious and put some amazing doctors and nurses on her team!  They have ALL been soooo good to us.  Although I will probably be just as crazy today, since getting no sleep due to the nurses coming in and out every 30 minutes to change IVs, and check temps and heart rates consistantly.... I'm more optimistic!  Praising the Lord for my little girl and praising Him for healing her.  The doctor came in early this morning, around 5:50-6:00am.  He told us most of the results from her spinal tap came back looking better than they had thought, but they want to keep her another 24-48 hours to keep a close eye on her.  Anyway.... my reason for telling you her story is for your prayers.  We love our baby girl and feel so incredibly blessed to have her in our lives.  God is GOOD!  And another amazing moment... this morning I realized I would have left for the Created to Care retreat yesterday.  It was held in GA, and thankfully after getting placed and knowing she would only be a month old, decided that wasn't the best decision for our family quite yet.  As sad as I was yesterday morning reading  blog posts of all my fellow blogging friends getting excited about heading up - I now realize God had a much bigger purpose for me not going.

I praise Him this morning for His beautiful plans!  Thank you Lord for your protection and care!

Please keep praying for us and for Katherine Grace!  Until then... Brantley

7 comments:

Lauren said...

Brantley I am praying -- I know just how you feel when you say you're helpless. Tucker's been admitted to the hospital 3 times and it's just so heartbreaking to know there's nothing you can do except pray and hope...

Sending MANY prayers and hugs...

Amy said...

Oh I am sooo sorry to hear about Katherine Grace's illness! Will be praying for peace and rest for you and your family. You will be back home together as a family soon!

Andrea said...

Praying, praying, praying Brantley! Hoping for some good sleep tonight for you and that you'll be heading home soon.

Lindsay said...

Will say a prayer for sweet Katherine Grace. My daughter had RSV a few weeks ago and I know that helpless, awful feeling. Will be thinking of your family.

Jill P. McCormick said...

Brantley, We are praying that Katherine Grace will be healed quickly and be able to come home very soon. I can only imagine how scarey this is for you and Richard.

Sara said...

We are praying for you guys, there is nothing scarier than an unknown illness in your little one. Please, please let us know if you need anything!
Sara

STEFFIEJ said...

HEY BRANTLEY..I AM NEW TO YOUR BLOG..MY CO-WORKER READS YOUR BLOG BC SHE ALSO HAS ADOPTED A CHILD IN THE PAST..AND SHE TOLD ME OF YOUR STORY...SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT KATHERINE GRACE..I KNOW EXACTLY HOW YOU FEEL BC MY LIL' GIRL WAS HOSPITALIZED AT 2 1/2 MTHS...AFTER THREE DAYS OF TESTS AND HER HAVING A FEVER OF 102.5 AND THEM TREATENING TO DO A SPINAL TAP NEXT, THEY FINALLY FIGURED OUT THEY SHE HAD A URINARY TRACT INFECTION..SO MAYBE THAT IS SOMETHING YOU COULD QUESTION THEM ABOUT..THEY AT FIRST THOUGHT SHE HAD KIDNEY REFLEX BUT AFTER RUNNING THAT TEST AND DOING ULTRASOUNDS, IT WAS JUST A REGULAR URNIARY TRACT INFECTION..SHE HAD HAD A COUPLE OF BAD NUMBER 2'S AND TO NOT BE GROSS THEY WERE BLOWOUTS WHICH MADE THEM GET IN THE FRONT AREA..AND COME TO FIND OUT NOW, SHE IS JUST A VERY SENSITIVE CHILD TO THINGS LIKE THAT..SHE IS SIX NOW..AND WE HAVE HAD ABOUT FOUR OF THEM SINCE THEN..SHE HAS TO USE UNSCENTED SOAP AND CAN NEVER DO BUBBLE BATHS..BUT I KNOW I'M NOT A DOCTOR BUT JUST WANTED TO THROW THAT OUT THERE FOR U BC EVEN OUR DOCTORS TOOK THREE DAYS TO FIGURE THAT OUT..WE'LL DEFINITELY BE PRAYING FOR YOU AND KATHERINE GRACE..I KNOW AS A MOMMY HOW HARD IT IS TO WATCH YOUR CHILD AND FEEL HELPLESS..BUT HANG IN THERE..THIS TOO SHALL PASS!!